Track By Tracks: Hellaphant - Crumble And Rise (2023)

1.3 Kicks:

This is our 1st song of the live set It's a straight punch to the throat. Based on the lies told to win someone into your life. Promise the world, give them nothing. I wrote it initially as the opening track to shows. We play a lot without sound checks and it was a good song to get levels with but it took on a life of its own with the band.

2. Maybe Pain:

The facade of mental health. Always pretending you're fine. Even when you ask for help, you are fine "Help me, Nothing's wrong. I'm bleeding and I'm gone. I don't think that I am crazy'". It really is a nail-on-the-head song.

3. Got the Mime:

Got the Mime is my favorite to play, Energy wise. Gets me stoked live. It's a song I write about having intrusive thoughts. Having the best day of your life and the thoughts come in and derail it. Zero reason for it to happen but damn if it doesn't destroy some great times.

4. Forget You:

This is a little more personal for me (well they all are lol) but over the past little while I lost my parents. My dad lost his battle with mental health and my mom to cancer. After my dad's passing my mom had been misdiagnosed and prescribed pain medications. Heavy stuff, fentanyl, morphine, etc and due to this she became a person who caused a lot of issues in my life. I referred to it as fire starting. Cause a problem and act like they did nothing to cause it. While I was fixing that issue another one was started etc. The song is about that time. She eventually got off the meds and rebuilt the relationship.

5. I Master Hate:

The song title came before anything. The idea is that I am bigger than my hate. I can control it. Rise above it and find a better way or walk away. The main riff is the song. It hit me one night. I played it all the time and even the band would play along with it and we created the song. The lyrics were written on the spot in the studio (which is new to me). I normally have it all worked out ahead of time but this was just a bad day. I was watching the world falling apart (IMO). Politics usually sets me off. The lyrics just flowed from there.

6.Backwards:

This is a very old song for me. I wrote it, recorded it, and released it with my old band -LAME-. It fits the design of the Hellaphant album. The other side of mental health. The song was written about a myth. A group of teens were drinking and playing hide and go-seek. Just being kids. The switch is that one of them is not doing well mentally and turns it into a horror film and kills everyone.

7. Infectus:

Inspired by the politics of Texas. The ruling stripped women of their rights over their bodies and reproductive rights. (I wrote a very long paragraph on this but deleted it. I get pretty pissed off about it. What a fucked up world). Any hoo. We recorded it with Simon Larochette and donated the rough mix version to a Women's rights compilation called "Abolish the Senate".

8. Moral Dilemma:

This was one of the 1st Hellaphant songs written and finished from the beginning. It's the breakup tune but the realization after that you are better off. It's a tipping point. Carry the hurt and let it rule you or gain the freedom when you get over that mountain. "We're nothing from something". Most of us can relate to it. Not even just in romantic relationships. It can happen in any relationship. Work, friends, etc.

9. Digits:

I've had this song in my pocket for a while. It didn't hit right until Chris and Scott joined the band. They brought an edge to it that was missing. Straight up "FUCK YOU' song to all the people in your life that have discounted you, screwed you over, used you, hurt you, stole, broken you or your heart. Some nights when we play it and the crowd goes off. It lets it out for everyone.

10. Shingles:

The realization it's over. The games people play intentionally hurt each other when it's over. As my dad once said. "Wanna see their true feelings for you? break up. LOL "You tell me all the things I never did. It's not the words you say but how they're said". We all ride that roller coaster at some point. My heart goes out to anyone dealing with it. Hurt doesn't discriminate. It just hurts.

11. Orphan:

The original title of the album. I had gone as far as to paint the cover for it. It was a comic book style "The Orphan". It is written from the perspective of a person who grew up an orphan and it's the promise of never leaving.