Behind The Tracks: Gather The Lost - Never Home (Single) (2025)

Carolyn: ‘Never Home’ was one of the first songs Gather the Lost came up with, and one of the few songs that have made it from the early days onto our debut album. I had written it (lyrics/vocal melody) before the band even existed, if I remember correctly, and then recorded the vocals on my phone and sent them over to Alan to see what his thoughts were. Luckily, he loved it and was able to completely link in with the song. He understood beautifully how to bring out the depth and emotion of the song with guitar and the importance of getting the track just right. Once we had vocals and guitar down, it was over to bass and drums.

The song has evolved a good bit since the early days. Brian (Bass) and Ronan (Drums) really made sure to bring their own style but kept it subtle enough that the heart of the song wasn’t lost. A good musician knows the importance of not overdoing it in some songs; less can be more. We normally have heavier, more complex songs, but the guys are great musicians because they knew what was needed and they understood the song's importance.

With ‘Never Home’, I was deeply looking at the construct that exists, the societal expectations, and the ideas society created on what a normal person looks like and what the road to success should be. I struggled with every part of that construct, even as a young child. Watching everyone else move so seamlessly through life when I struggled with even the smallest things. It always felt like I was able to put a mask on and show up, but internally I was an outsider peaking in. There was a lot of depression and anxiety that I would battle from the age of 5, and that stemmed from life being too difficult to manage, really. After writing Never Home, I got diagnosed with ADHD and traits of Autism, which makes the song even more meaningful. Learning that made the song have even more value to me. The acceptance that there is no ‘one right way’ to succeed. The road to happiness is different for everyone. That this ‘tick the box in this order’ way of living is extremely outdated. No wonder I always struggled; my brain works differently anyway.

This song may seem like a soft and gentle rock ballad that has a big build (especially compared to our other songs), but it’s a far bigger, far deeper song. I hope that others who are struggling as I did will feel that there is someone else out there who just ‘gets it’ and they don’t have to keep following the same path as everyone else. They can be brave enough to figure out their own path and focus on themselves for a change.